We've learned it in church, we've been battling it our whole lives, and will continue to do just that: to overcome the carnal mind. The human desires- laziness, lust, jealousy, zeal; the human mind.
If there is one thing I've learned this year, it would be that my biggest enemy is myself. I'm my harshest critique, my own reason for failure, and I can talk myself out of every productive thing.
I'm sure everyone knows I've had a terrible issue with my weight over the months; being 100 lbs. one week, and 125 lbs. a few weeks later. It was devastating. And gaining back my weight was terrible for me- how could you have missed that?
But now I have another issue- controlling how MUCH I eat. I always eat healthy. But it's my snacking that gets me in trouble. That's what makes me feel guilty beyond measure.
I can so honestly admit to having an eating disorder. Not like anorexia or bulimia, but an obsession/guilt with exercising, healthy eating, and missing a workout. Every single day I battle this. Sometimes I feel like this is worse than any other disorder. Why? Because I'm never comfortable in my own skin. Because I become so obsessed with outward appearance. Because I never have a thought that isn't intruded upon by weight.
I do crossfit before practice, I go to practice at 6 every day, I run, I do personal workouts.. I do everything, and yet I'm still unhappy with my self image. Look what this terrible world has done to beautiful young women.
I'm sorry for everyone that deals with this same issue. I think you're beautiful :)
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