being invisible S.U.C.K.S.

Sweet pea, Apple of my eye...Don't know when and I don't know why....You're the only reason I keep on coming home....................................................Sweet pea, Keeper of my soul, I know sometimes I'm out of control. You're the only reason I keep on coming home.

oh how sadly pathetic that is... because it's true.

after this terrible weekend, (first getting a call canceling your date, second seeing a deer and almost peeing my pants, and a few more unfortunate events that i will not talk about. then the next day showing up at a baseball game to find that every single one of your stupid friends is there.... and you didn't receive an invite. o.u.c.h. then fighting a friend until she agrees to going to this party, but only if you'll come in and say hi. ((mind you i was NOT invited and was NOT intending on staying)) i went and found out that basically every single one of my stupid friends was there. o.u.c.h.) i realized that i have no friends.

none.

my 'team'.... yeah. they don't even acknowledge me. it's fine. NOT.
on more than one occasion, i will walk up to them and try to strike up a conversation, but i will get ignored.... like i wasn't even there, let alone speaking to them. sorry, *ladies*..... i didn't know i'm not good enough to hold a conversation with you. sorry for thinking you liked me. at least a little bit.

now... if you've never had this kind of feeling... you're lucky. because lately, it's my constant companion.

some might say it's my fault. maybe because of that boy, but let me inform you... it is not him.

the reason i spend so much time with him is because, from the very beginning, you never liked us. get over yourselves. it is your life??? NO. do you have any right to think the things you do or say the things you do?? NO.
thank goodness i have at least one person that will stick by my side. listen to my tears. my fears. my insecurities. thank goodness for best friends. you're the reason i keep comin home.
(and thank you to one friend inparticular...who sat with me and listened. i love you.)


have a fabulous week.
only 4 more days.
for me.
i'll try to enjoy it.
...and try not to burst into spontaneous tears.
TAH
XXX

YOU AGGRAVATE ME: just take my hints....

U.G.H.

you would THINK people would be smart!!

NEWSFLASH

:

they aren't.

just leave me be.

please.

pleeeeeeeeeeeeease.

PLEASE.

PLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEASE!!!!

our lives would be easier if you just stopped.

N.O.W.

TAH

XXX

Oh Hey: life. is. GOOD.

So.
I've been absent for a little while :] i've been worrying about

tryouts!!!

Yep...

CAVETTES!!!

We had clinics Tuesday and Wednesday, then tryouts yesterday. and let me tell you!! i was so confident!! i've never been like that before... i think i'm gonna make a habit of it :] i felt suuuuuper good about everything. and everything turned out just as i wanted it to!!!

the girls that have joined my team are great and i am SOOOOO EXCITED to get to know them!! we're going to be great friends and we're gonna have a greaaaaat year together :]

there are just a few things that i'm going to have to make clear to a few people :]

life is so great!!!!!
and its warm :]
AND ITS THE WEEKEND!!!
tah
xxx

I'm annoyed: you know those kinds of days?....

you know those kinds of days when everything bothers you???

i'm at the start of one of those days right now.

and its only first period. kill me.

this should be a good day. 

tah

xxx

May: first official day of sun bathing....

yes. i am one of those people who consider 60 degrees to be warm

but i couldn't help it!!

it was beautiful :]

and after lunch today.....

i just had to get back out there!

but this time, in a swimsuit.

it was very refreshing and i have my fill of vitamin D.

today i also decided what i'm doing this weekend.

1. i'm doing a makeover

2. it's going to be on a boy

3. i will be recieving one in return

4. it will be done by a boy

5. i have very willing and wonderful friends :]

TAHXXX

Chloe's random thoughts: i admire you.

While reading a blog post of a dearly loved friend, i realized that she may be one of the strongest people i know. you are amazing. and i look up to you so much.

when it comes to be my turn, i don't how i'm going to handle it. i just hope and pray that maybe, just maybe, i'll take it like you; like a strong girl who is excited about the future, and over looks the bad things. i look up to you so much. you are amazing.

while thinking about my future and what crazy things may happen, i realized that it's time to completely let go. don't be chloe. just totally let go and be free. because i don't think i have ever, not once, done that. i've always been my tightly wound, paranoid, fun sucking self.... too shy to be myself. and i'm not going to keep doing that. tryouts are in a week and half, and i am SO nervous. i'm working on my captains solo this weekend, and THAT is when i must let go and be anything but myself. wish me luck.

i have never looked up to so many people than i do right now. i am so very grateful for the people in my life. you have all taught me so much. whether it be from your mistakes, your trials, or your smiles; everything you do has blessed me richly. i love you.

i am going to stop being jealous. i am going to stop getting mad at people for no reason. i am only going to be excited and optimitic about things.

have a wonderful weekend.
i also hope i have one, too.


tahxxx

And my life begins again starting.....NOW!!!: Cavettes :)

Yaya!!! New coach has finally arrived!!
She's
Young
Blonde
TINY
Amazing dancer!!
AMERICAN FORK DRILL TEAM COACH!!
Her name is McCall Tickson :)
She used to coach Jordan (sucks for Jordan!) but now shes with us!
Iiiiiii have a wonderful feeling about her, some thinks she's too young, but looking at how Jordan did last year: 4th in region, 4th(I think) in state, 1st in nationals!! So she's bound to be good.... Right??
Oh I hope so :)
Yay for bad things!! They only bring better things to you :)

TahXXX